At this point in the winter, most conversations include some chatting about colds, flus, infections, and snot. May this post be no different. Sources of pain from the last three days:
- Boy: what's wrong? Me: I HAVE A COLD! I JUST TOLD YOU THAT! Why can't you just love me enough to coo over me? Boy: I'm sorry, what did you say? Honey, what's wrong?
- My job spares no expense for tissues. Oh, no wait, they cost about 27 cents a box. And they feel that way.
- The sudden sneeze that sprays yellow gunk all down my chin and shirt.
- Why do my arms feel numb?
- When I eat, I taste nothing, so instead of just not eating much, I eat spicier things and have no way of knowing if my breath smells horrid (which it absolutely does).
- I'm so uninteresting; all I want to talk about is my cold.
Having said these things, now I shall share what I should be (and want to be) paying careful attention to, especially in my writing:
- Boy with new government job will soon be investigating the most serious allegations of child abuse/neglect in the state. He came home bothered and stressed after a day at Children's Hospital being trained on child sexual abuse. Step aside, I have a cold.
- Someone close to me has recently checked into rehab for a serious addiction and I haven't tried to reach him--not sure what to say or do, but I think of him constantly. I'll get around to reaching out when my head clears up.
- I know a very low-functioning woman who is trying to beat an addiction to meth while raising 7 children alone AND being treated for serious cervical cancer. I watch her and know that she can't do it. I have almost never felt that about anyone. Okay, no cold touches that one.
- A pregnant co-worker is miserable to be around (not due to hormones, due to history and personality) and I feel sorry that she seems to have no joy about her pregnancy and, soon, new baby. I feel even sorrier that her misery turns potential support systems away-- including me. I want to sprinkle my used tissues on her desk and see how her OCD craziness rages.
- One of my best friends is battling a recent MS diagnosis. May I rot in self-indulgent hell.
But really, I have a cold. And it sucks and I want and deserve to sleep through it Also? I just ate a box of Milk Duds. When you can't taste, make sure you eat a ton of useless calories that get stuck in your fillings--that's my motto.