Thursday, August 23, 2007

Eau de CRAP

Dearest Fragrant Pea,

Some time in the middle of the day yesterday, my apartment developed a smell. A deeply unpleasant death-like odor. A nostril-splitting, stomach-turning, crazy-making sort of stench. On hands and knees with a flashlight, on a ladder with a screwdriver, on a maddened rampage, I tore the place apart. I looked over, under, and in everything I could lay hands on. The odd thing is that the smell is strongest right in the middle of the room; when I get near any surface, cabinet, wall, or piece of furniture, the smell fades, only to return when I move to the open air.

WHERE IS IT COMING FROM??????????????????????

As you can imagine, I'm slightly at the end of my rope about this...

Yours craving congestion,



pea in a pod said...

Did you sniff the floor in the middle of the room? Or towards the ceiling? The only smell I've ever smelled that was as hideous as the one you describe was a dead body in another apartment in the building. Or maybe a dead animal in the ceiling/floor. Good luck with that!

pea in a pod said...

Or maybe it's invisible floating poo. That's always a possibility.

pea in a pod said...

When did you leave near a dead body? Gross!

It might be a dead mouse in the ceiling.

Or, of course, a floating poo.