Late Night Pea,
The Ex sent me his wedding photos tonight. It was all tolerable-- like seing an old friend in pictures, until I saw his hand with the ring on it. It's the littlest things that bite. And yet, nothing is sexier on my Boy than his left hand with its ring. I remember touching my father's ring while holding his scratchy hand and somehow, through years of time with him and exposure to "traditional" (read: straight, American, 20th Century, etc.) marriage symbols, I have equated that ring with manliness. But more than manliness-- a kind of strength and fortitude that goes beyond any reasonable expectations a child (or a woman) should have for a father (or a husband). And yet. We've been through this before: invincible fathers, fearless caretakers, fierce daughter-protectors, and on and on. When you look down at the hand of the one you love and there is a shadow of your father's hand (especially if he is Super Dad): wow. So seeing that ring on Ex reminded me that he could not, would not be that man for me a mere two years ago. And yet, I have so much now. Does any of this resonate with you? Or is there something else that your Boy has/does that echoes with your own dad?
Half asleep with head wide awake,